So I guess I feel its time to talk a bit about the main focus in my life right now - Stupid Cancer!
After many mammograms, ultrasounds, cytology and finally biopsies, I have been diagnosed with Invasive Ductal Cancer - Grade 3. That all sounds a bit technical, but essentially means that although my first Surgeon thought I had DCIS - in situ, meaning the cancer had not spread - actually now I have cancer that has spread - throughout a quarter of my right breast. So now I have to have a full mastectomy, followed by chemotherapy...... this was not on my radar and I have been floored by it all!
Now I am a strong person, I have been through many horrible, yes truly horrible, health issues in my life and I have already been given 3 months to live - 15 years ago - before my kidney transplant, but somehow I never even considered that I would get Breast Cancer. I don't smoke, I breastfed, there is no incidence of Breast Cancer in my family ......... so its a huge shock and one which I am not too sure I have got my head around.
Things have now moved quite quickly and my surgery is scheduled for a week today - one more week of my boob left - I wonder how we are going to spend our last days together! Well.....we are off to a Brunch on Friday and then I have booked 2 rounds of golf since I think it will be a while before I am able to swing a club again :(
I will get through this - there is no other option - but I really really wonder why me? Why, when I have had so many other hideous health problems, do I end up with yet another one....... But the more I think of that, the worse I feel, so best to forget about that and more about the journey ahead.
Looking on the bright side (because lets face it thats the only side to look at....) I have been blessed with some lovely friends and family who are very supportive - yes I might lose my hair (lets be honest I WILL lose my hair) but there are opportunities in that for more knitting (think cute chemo caps) and shopping (think gorgeous silk scarves for head covers).
Of course there has been lots of speculation and advice about staying here in Abu Dhabi as opposed to going back home to the UK for treatment - well my decision is to stay - I have my family here and I don't want to be away from my kids. The sun shines everyday and the Doctors are all trained in the UK or the US and the hospital treats the Royal Family - and to be honest, Abu Dhabi probably puts more money into healthcare here than I can even possibly calculate in my head!!! Billions of $$$$.
And in my mind Mastectomy is Mastectomy at this stage, no matter where it is done. Breast reconstruction down the line might be an option for which I go home for, but again, in terms of cosmetic surgery........the UAE has it covered.......!!!
Lets just get these next couple of months out of the way and then I will decide........